Why Being Homeless Is Not a Bad Idea

By Sophia Christensen

As housing prices skyrocket and wages remain stagnant, homelessness has progressively become a more prevalent, detrimental issue. San Jose and San Francisco are the top two most expensive cities to live in with the highest ranked median value of a home. Simultaneously, employers just refuse to match their workers’ wages to the rise in prices for housing which makes it nearly impossible to fully pay for a house or apartment. Luckily, immense progress has been made amongst struggling workers, as new trends of “housing” styles address the growing challenges of being a homeowner.  

The number one alternative to housing would hands down have to be cardboard. Cardboard is easily accessible and you can continue to build onto your plot as you find more material. Some cardboard houses have become so extensive, their value is competitive with the biggest houses, outshining the nearby snobby neighbors. Unlike any regular house, cardboard homes offer immense support in transportation and mobility. If you are not feeling the suburban vibe and want to move closer to the beach, all you have to do is fold up the cardboard and start skipping toward the shore to rebuild your home. The flexibility of cardboard is unlike anything else—both physically and metaphorically. The house in general is extremely comfortable and adaptable to any style of living. No doubt the thickness of a cardboard will also keep you warmer than a comforter or blanket ever will. There’s also free AC and a heater known promptly as the wind and sun, which offer an eco-friendly and cheaper alternative to expensive heating. The sun will either keep you warm or extremely sweaty during the day and wind will offer a nice breeze during the day or freeze at night–it all depends on the season but it’s bearable especially with the cardboard durance giving extra insulation. Expensive and extravagant houses could not even begin to compare to the cardboard lifestyle. 

The second alternative is my personal favorite, all you have to do is look around your neighborhood for a tree house AKA a FREE house! The height not only allows you to spot one easily, but it also allows for a gorgeous view with skylight roofing that ordinary people pay millions for. The tree house also allows for the practice of green living and encourages you to find your inner natural human instincts rather than wasting energy and water to generate ways of living. Nature becomes your bathroom and place for food. If you are starving from lack of pay, then simply eat the fruit, leaves, and nuts you gather, or squirrels you hunt. If you are worried about all of that eating, have no fear! There is a built-in gym! The climbing of a tree is plenty of exercise especially if done multiple times throughout the day–you could easily put on a calorie deficit or gain humongous muscles by just using body weight. Typically, people spend large bands to install an at home gym, but everything a millionaire could possibly want already comes free with the tree house itself! For instance, whether it be cabinets, counter tops, or flooring–millionaires crave wood authenticity and end up sacrificing their left leg just for fake wood. Ridiculous! With the tree house, you get the real and all natural wood applied all around your home. Guaranteed, a tree house will provide you with all of your basic necessities at a low rate of zero dollars! Rather than wasting all of your hard earned money on a mansion, hope of the new tree house trend.

Although I enjoy this ideal way of living, the only downside is that sometimes I feel dirty after spending a couple years living in a cardboard box or a tree house, and I would kill for a nice warm shower–but the cold hose usually does the trick. I do also get pretty sick from the extremity of the weather conditions I experience first hand, and it makes me fantasize about life spent in a comfortable home. However, considering my stagnant pay and the exponential rise of housing, that would just be a waste of money. So until the price of housing goes down, I’ll be in a tree house, enjoying my skylight view.