It’s like the sudden switch from a manic to lowly depressive state; one day, you flail your arms in triumph, ecstatic at the sight of a good score on an essay, the very next day, those same arms slowly sway down like a falling feather, as you witness a lower score on a multiple-choice question exam. The emotionally and mentally demanding AP English Language curriculum brought out the highest levels of my writing abilities—regardless of whether it earned an A—forcing me to think critically about the many dilemmas surrounding global discourse. I feel as though I have transformed into a weathered writer, confident in my analysis of hidden meanings and the specific hints an author leaves to help us piece together the puzzle of their message and grandeur. Thus, after an arduous year of ups and downs, my understanding of the many writing components we covered has evolved through analysis of masterfully written books or essays that delve into the intricacies of a writer’s intention, and through a series of thorough reviews of my graded essays.
These books, which we read as a class throughout the year, vary in genre, each metaphorically tackling a plethora of subjects written by suppressed voices of rebellious minds. These books, the same ones that nuanced our understanding of social, political, or economic complexities, forced us to explore the map with hidden passages that the author hath laid down before us. These books, the ones that I, an explorer of the human intellect, thoroughly explored. Books like The Catcher in the Rye: Holden Caulfield’s repudiation of adulthood and the thought of growing up are easily comparable to the infamous character who never seems to want to grow up, Peter Pan. Moreover, J.D. Salinger’s informal, yet intuitive construction of Holden’s character extends far deeper than a simple fictitious moral dilemma; instead, it reflects how many like Holden, immature young folk who seem to want to save others from the “phoniness” of adulthood, struggle as outsiders in society. After reading this book, the comprehensive analysis I conducted across many assignments and projects on it expanded my area of expertise in decoding an author’s secret message. As a reference, looking back to my freshman year, I would have never thought to decode the superficially simple character of Holden Caulfield. I would never have intended to look beyond Holden’s red hunting hat to see the real mechanics of his and Salinger’s minds. Now, as an almost graduate of the AP English Language curriculum, I find myself capable of mimicking such nuance in my own writing, where I can expand on outwardly simple topics and add my very own touch of style. All thanks to reading a book.
Next, an extensive review of my essays deeply impacted my ability to learn from my mistakes. Almost every time after the in-class essays were written, I figured my essays were nearly perfect. That the 5/6 or the 6/6 was mine for the taking, only to see the 3/6 expressively sneering at me. Right then, I realized the value of a separate perspective: a fixed mind would lead me nowhere; without criticism from another point of view, I would never truly grow, let alone learn to appreciate the sophistication and diversity in writing. Specifically, I vividly remember my synthesis essay on space junk. My smile after I pressed submit, boastfully thinking, “Man, that was one of the best pieces I’ve ever written.” Weeks later, and to my contemporary surprise, I saw a score of 3.5 blaringly labeled on the paper. Obviously, I was immaturely outraged at the time, yet I finally put my ego aside to read the comments there, and the emotions that overtook me went as follows: I was shocked. The ever-so-sensical comments left on the paper allowed me to awaken from the confined slumber of my egotistical confidence and appeal to the suggestions where I could improve my writing. Different word choices, mixing up the sentence patterns, diving more into analysis rather than summarizing- it was all making sense to me. This experience really impacted my outlook on how intensely rich another angle could benefit anything in life, but in this case, my writing. Beyond the jumbles of words that define the stereotypical smart individual, firm in their foundation of the English language, I feel as though, in other situations one may encounter in the workplace, classroom, or in life, another stance enhances the elaborateness and authenticity of your work. Therefore, through reviews of my essays, I learned the value of incorporating or even just considering others’ feedback. Put your ego aside.
In conclusion, AP English Language’s impact on my broader vision of the world and my writing has infinitely transformed me. I feel a sense of confidence in my words and my critical thinking that I never could have imagined. Wherever this universe decides to take me, whether it aids me in reaching my “personal legend” or leads me on an unforgettable adventure, I feel as though I will always carry the skills I learned in AP English Language with me along for the journey.