By Mia Hanuska
I’ve always known I was a night owl. Okay, maybe not always, but pretty much. I much prefer working into the night rather than waking up late. And I’ve always been told that I’m wrong for it, that I’ve just really messed up my sleep schedule and I need to fix it—I wasn’t normal. But then I researched it and found out it’s not abnormal. I’m not abnormal.
Plus, in order to be “abnormal,” we must then define “normal.” What constitutes as “normal?” How do we make something “normal?” Is it when enough people do it? The dictionary defines it as “conforming to a type, standard, or regular pattern,” but who gets to decide what that type or standard is? Maybe to a certain group of people, wearing big socks on their heads is standard or “normal,” but at Westmont, they’d probably get laughed at.
Looking back on my high school career, I can think of a lot of things I’ve learned. A lot of experiences I’ve experienced, many of which I aim to completely forget; some, to cherish forever. But if I had to sum it up for my fellow brainrotted, short-attention-spanned peers, it’d be: don’t be afraid to be “abnormal.”
For those who don’t know me but have seen me around, or for all the parents/teachers/randoms online who have never met me in person, I am the girl you may or may not have seen on campus in suits. Sometimes ties too; although rarely. Turns out wearing a suit as a 16-year-old sophomore tends to turn some heads, especially when a pair of heeled boots’ clopping announces it from 15 feet away. I’m not sure what drew me to wearing suits, or overdressing in general, but despite the weird looks (some stares, I will admit) in the halls and a couple of not-so-nice interrogations from a couple people, I find it’s what I feel confident and comfortable in. I think people eventually got used to the suits, and it helped that my friends were supportive, but regardless, the first few times were difficult, as silly as it may sound. It’s difficult to try to explain why you like what you like, especially when it’s not the norm. If I had started wearing pajama pants and a hoodie daily, nobody would’ve looked my way, but since that’s not how I express myself, people ask questions. I may not dress “normal,” but why should I conform to a standard that I don’t feel comfortable in?
Another thing I found falls under this umbrella of “normal” is doing things you don’t want to do. See, some would call it “peer pressure”—frankly, I think that’s wrong. Because “peer pressure” invites the idea that someone would punish or force you to do something. But from what I’ve learned? People normally don’t really care, and you really don’t have to do anything you don’t want to (within reason, of course). You don’t want to go to a party? Then don’t. You start to feel uncomfortable around people, but don’t want to ruin the vibes for them? You can literally just make up an excuse and leave. I find most people are respectful and especially if you get your parents involved—pro tip: always blame the parents—they won’t ask questions. If you don’t want to do something, nothing is stopping you from blaming homework, parents, chores, grades, even just “something came up,” so you don’t have to go. I think a lot of people hesitate before doing stuff like this because they feel like it’s not normal to not want to hang out with friends/go out partying or are worried they’ll get made fun of (“get a life! You’re so boring!”), but like, who cares??? You get to do whatever you want to do, and they get to do whatever they want to do, so why does it matter? This is something I only just recently learned, and it’s truly so freeing. You are in charge of your own life, and don’t compromise on your wants or values just because some people have different ones.
However, I feel like I also need to preface that, as much as I hate it, abnormal is not always good. Bringing back the night owl example, going to sleep late while living in a morning-bird society is… harmful, to say the least. My mom will regularly get asked, “How does Mia do all of it? Does she sleep??” to which her unfortunate answer is: “Uhhh no, she doesn’t.” As much as I love working at night (definitely not writing this at 02:00), it has been harmful to my body. And as much as I hate to admit it, it’s the furthest thing from a sustainable habit I could have. There were some weeks in high school when I would be averaging 3.5–4 hours a night, especially during the peak of robotics season. It’s a very, very hard habit to break—I’m working on it—and I fear for my college schedule (please, whoever replaces Timothy Sands, give me a good schedule next year). So, I guess being abnormal does have some drawbacks. It’s easier to justify poor habits with “you just don’t understand, this is who I am” rather than admit that you’re ruining yourself. So, I guess take all my advice with a grain of salt, and remember to check in with yourself regularly.
After all, we are all human, and we are all abnormal in our own unique ways. Maybe you don’t wear suits to school, or collect fun socks, or are obsessed with carrots, or stay up far too late. But maybe you have a favorite show others hate, or you really like geese, or you just adore the color purple. High school is the place of expression, and depending on where you go to college, you’ll (hopefully) never have to see most of them again. So sure, they may remember you as the “weird suit girl,” but then again, you’ll probably remember them in other slightly embarrassing ways, like the “guy who tried heat gunning his wet shirt” or the “girl who got hit in the head with a volleyball in 8th grade.” Everything is relative. Ultimately, don’t let “normal” tie you down. Wear whatever you want to wear, be whatever you want to be—it’s your life: live it how you want to live it.