By Lucky Felder and Samhita Holla
We’ve all seen those fifteen-second videos that make baking seem like a cakewalk. When we landed on a TikTok of tiramisu brownies that made our mouths water, our egos stepped in and we forgot to remind ourselves that we are extremely incompetent when it comes to all things baking. Still, we decided to try our hand at this recipe just for fun, because how bad could it possibly be… right?
Not only was this a last minute decision, but not a single baker lives in either of our households, so we weren’t exactly stocked with ingredients. After an impromptu trip to Safeway where we dropped $40, we laid out everything on the kitchen counter and realized we didn’t get coffee. But fear not, Lucky’s grandma lives a walking distance away, and was happy to give us some of the coffee she had brewed that morning (and also give Samhita a house tour). Once back in the kitchen, we ran into multiple problems.
Problem #1: Recipes on TikTok are almost exclusively measured in grams (who said we have a scale?). Each time we added an ingredient, one of us had to google a conversion. We suspect this annoyance might have contributed to mishaps later down the road.
Problem #2: The ingredients we bought were different from whatever special products the original creator had. When we attempted to brown the butter, which we already had no clue how to do, it resulted in a completely different color than what we saw on the screen.
Problem #3: We used every baking utensil and bowl we could find. Chaos and mess ensued, leaving us with a lot of cleanup and a cluttered workspace. Not a very smart move on our part.
Problem #4: We gave up. Baking requires quite the delicate touch, something that we don’t have. Towards the end of our tiramisu journey, we started to eyeball the measurements and wing it, simply making random decisions. At this point, we began worrying for the future of our brownies.
Problem #5: We didn’t buy enough mascarpone, which is kind of an essential ingredient to this recipe. Furthermore, while mixing the mascarpone and heavy whipping cream, we started to notice the not-so-delicious-looking texture of the substance, which was clearly different from the delectable mixture shown in the tutorial. We tried to smooth it out by deviating from the recipe and adding more whipping cream, and it eventually became a flavorless topping to the final product.
Problem #6: In an attempt to produce an exact match to the original, we confidently added a massive layer of 100% unsweetened cocoa powder on top. After refrigerating it for 2 hours, just like the recipe said, we were super excited to taste it. Simply put, it looked atrocious. There were sections that were less powdered with cocoa, had white streaks through the sides, and even more, the surface was uneven. When we cut into the brownies, we realized we had made a big mistake once we saw the THICK layer of cocoa powder on top of the mascarpone. Additionally, the bottom was rock hard and the parchment got cut off with the brownie. Yet, we believed that the taste of the dessert would surely save it. Finally, we took a bite. We were wrong. The first hit of the cocoa powder was perhaps the most disgusting thing to ever disgrace our tongues…
Delusionally, we believed that it must have been the cocoa powder ruining the taste. Plus, at this point we just wanted to salvage the brownies so they would at least be edible. So, we resolved to lop off the mounds of cocoa powder. Yet, as we did so, we realized we hadn’t been careful enough and that some of the mascarpone and ladyfingers underneath had been dragged with the powder. This contributed to an even more atrocious looking piece of work.
However, it’s all about the taste, is it not? So with renewed confidence, we each took a bite. It definitely tasted slightly better than before, but five times zero is still zero. This time, the taste didn’t summon our gag reflexes, but it gave us absolutely NOTHING. Disheartened, we offered the dish around, gaining a grimace from each person. Accepting defeat, we slid the pan back into the refrigerator for the final time…
In conclusion, this total FAIL can be traced back to many origins. Most beginner bakers would have gone with a simpler recipe, like chocolate chip cookies or banana bread, so perhaps we were too daring. However, most of the problems we encountered could’ve been solved with a little more foresight and effort. Admittedly, we had grossly underestimated the skill required for baking and ended up tasting our defeat. We applaud all the bakers out there. We’ll leave the tiramisu brownies up to you.
*Warning – below are some pictures we took during the process of this adventure. You might not want to look, because it looks inedible and absolutely repulsive, but suit yourself.
