How to Laugh Quietly 101

By Rina Weaver

Ah, high school—the breeding ground of stifled laughs and suppressed giggles. In this epoch of clandestine chortles, mastering the art of laughing quietly is as essential as acing your tests or avoiding the weirdly mushy crab in the sushi. Whether you’re in the midst of a boring lecture watching someone get run over on Instagram Reels, or just made eye contact with your friend as your teacher is yelling at you guys, fear not, dear high schoolers, for I’ve compiled the ultimate guide to honing your quiet laughing skills.

Before we delve into the intricate techniques of subdued laughter, let’s address the cornerstone of covert chuckling—the poker face. Picture yourself as a seasoned CIA agent infiltrating enemy territory; maintain a stoic expression no matter how hilarious the situation. Remember, your face is your fortress, and betraying even the faintest smirk could get you kicked out of class faster than you can say “straight face.” 

For scenarios demanding absolute silence, employ the silent chuckle—a feat requiring the finesse of a ninja and the self-control of a monk. Visualize the joke as though it’s an inside secret shared only between you and the walls. Subtly contract your abdominal muscles while keeping your lips firmly sealed. Congratulations, you’ve successfully laughed without making a sound. You’re practically a comedic mime.

In dire situations where laughter threatens to burst forth like a volcanic eruption, resort to the strategic cough—a clever ruse to disguise your mirth as a harmless throat tickle. Just time your cough perfectly, and voilà! You’ve seamlessly transformed your impending laughter into a seemingly innocent bodily reflex. Just make sure not to overdo it, or you’ll risk suspicion of harboring a terrible case of Covid

In the hallowed halls of high school, where solemnity reigns supreme and laughter is often viewed as a disruption, mastering the art of laughing quietly is akin to acquiring a superpower. Armed with the techniques outlined in this guide, you’re equipped to navigate even the most perilous of Instagram Reels with grace and stealth. So go forth, dear high schoolers, and let the silent symphony of suppressed laughter echo through the corridors of academia. Just remember to keep it quiet—or risk the wrath of the all-seeing teacher’s glare.

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