By Iha Shah
The Chronicles of the Instagram Activist: Saving the World, One Selfie at a Time
In a world plagued by injustice, inequality, and global crises, a new breed of hero emerges: the Instagram activist. Armed with nothing but a smartphone and a knack for filters, these valiant warriors take to the digital battlefield, ready to tackle the world’s most pressing issues one perfectly curated post at a time.
Weary from long days of scrolling, concerned citizens have realized that the days of rolling up their sleeves and getting their hands dirty are long gone. Why bother volunteering at a homeless shelter or joining a protest march when you can easily slap a trendy hashtag on a filtered photo of you driving by a homeless person and call it activism? I mean surely they appreciate the recognition. I doubt physical aid would be any more effective than their lowest moment being immortalized on the internet.
Recently, there has been a spike in global outrage over the Israel-Palestine conflict. You may be wondering how the Instagram activists are solving this issue. Behold, they bravely take to their keyboards, armed with nothing but a burning desire for validation. Individuals all over the world have taken to posting the growing death toll, and statistical and historical facts to solve the conflict. Undoubtedly, with persistent efforts in educating people on their platforms, the issue will simply cease to exist. People much prefer this method to donating and calling for government action because when has that ever gotten us anywhere?
Instagram activism removes the need for people to bother with tedious research and fact-checking, resolving the issue of shortened attention spans. We have replaced news articles with even more credible sources—memes and viral tweets. No need to bother with nuanced discussions, you can simply regurgitate the latest hot take from your favorite influencer. What a time saver!
The past generation changed the world one peaceful protest at a time; this generation changes the world one infographic Instagram story at a time. You no longer need to waste your precious time and money, when you can change the world with one Instagram repost from the comfort of your warm bed. Sure, Instagram activists may need to attend a protest or two, but only if there’s a photo op involved. After all, what’s the point of fighting for change if you can’t get the perfect shot for your grid?
In this ever-changing world, the ability to effect change lies not in action, but in the number of likes, shares, and comments one accumulates. Forget about donating to charities or volunteering your time; your Instagram feed holds the key to fighting against social injustice.
What good are real solutions when you can simply post a black square on your feed and call it solidarity? Wanna solve climate change? Just use a witty “#Climateaction” and a post of you holding a reusable water bottle with the caption “Save the turtles.” Poverty? A well-timed selfie with a starving orphan and a caption about counting your blessings should do the trick.
I’m sure the starving displaced citizens of war-torn countries greatly appreciate the precious 15 seconds you took out of your day to repost about their perilous lives.
Let’s not forget their noble efforts to raise awareness about the world’s most pressing issues. Nothing says “I care” quite like posting a jarring picture of bombed cities with the caption “#theydeservetobefree” and then promptly forgetting about it the next day. After all, real change is overrated when you can get the same dopamine hit from likes and comments.
Now, dear reader I will address you personally, many of you will not have lasted the length of the article—depleting attention spans and all that—and by now have scrolled to the end in lieu of comprehensive reading. As you sit on your couch and scroll through this article from your bed or your couch, I urge you not to do anything meaningful with your life, but to instead be sure to like, comment, and repost. I too would like to make a change one Instagram story at a time.
Welcome to The Shield’s annual satire section. Writers use satire to improve a problem in society. Sometimes readers misunderstand the satire as they do not recognize the hyperbole, irony, rhetorical questions, sarcasm, and understatements. A great satirist will also address counter-arguments (the non-satirical solution) with great mockery and sarcasm. Readers may mistake the satirical solution for the actual solution that the writer proposes. The ideas in these satire stories do not necessarily represent the opinions of The Shield or Westmont. If one is confused about satire, please contact a friendly neighborhood English teacher.