By Wesley Adams
- “Hey Soul Sister” by Train: 33/100
Was a great song as a kid, but doesn’t hold up well at all.
- “Best Day Of My Life” by American Authors: 70/100
Makes me want to spend $25 on a burger (without fries).
- “Fireflies” by Owl City: 88/100
Still a great song, even if it leans into guilty pleasure territory.
- “Viva La Vida” by Coldplay: 100/100
As a kid, this was like one of the greatest songs ever, and for good reason.
- “Pompeii” by Bastille: 97/100
Similar feelings to “Viva La Vida”, just slightly less.
- “Payphone” by Maroon 5: 85/100
Makes me wish payphones were still a thing.
- “Cheerleader” by OMI: 15/100
Scholastic bookfair type romance vibes
- “Glad You Came” The Wanted: 83/100
Honestly goes surprisingly hard
- “Good Time” By Owl City: 35/100
Fireflies, but more campy.
- “Airplanes” by BOB & Hayley Williams: 93/100
- “Wake Me Up” by Avicii: 25/100
Not Avicii’s best work, sorry.
- “Empire State Of Mind” by Jay-Z & Alicia Keys: 10/100
Overplayed song for tourists, or dudes dressed as Spider-Man on Times Square trying to scam tourists.
- “We Are Young” by fun.: 100/100
If I were to rank these instead of rating, this would be the top 3.
- “Riptide” by Vance Joy: 60/100
Canon eighth-grade crush anthem.
- “Tounge Tied” by Faber Drive: 89/100
Unfortunately overshadowed by GROUPLOVE’s “Tongue Tied,” but despite that this is still a really great song. (If songs could be friends, I think this song and “Everybody Talks” would be.)
“Somebody That I Used To Know” by Gotye: 97/100
- “Safe And Sound” by Capital Cities: 87/100
For the trumpet alone.
- “Everybody Talks” by Neon Trees: 98/100
Feels like a cold Arizona on a warm sunny day.
- “Take Me to Church” by Hozier: 10/100
Hard to properly enjoy Hozier post “Too Sweet.”
- “Moves Like Jagger” by Maroon 5: 63/100
Freaky song that no one has ever gotten freaky to.
- “Me And My Broken Heart” by Rixton: 55/100
Middle School rejection anthem.
- “I Gotta Feeling” by the Black Eyed Peas: 98/100
Iconic, another top 5 2010s song.
- “Locked Away” by R. City & Adam Levine: 89/100
It’s silly but enjoyable.
- “Counting Stars” by OneRepublic: 94/100
Unrelated, but this music is making me crave some Chuck E. Cheese… do y’all remember the Shane Dawson Chuck E. Cheese documentary? I digress.
- “Good Feeling” by Flo Rida: 40/100
Recession pop classic.
- “Radioactive” by Imagine Dragons: 80/100
I kinda miss P.E.
- “Locked out of Heaven” by Bruno Mars: 42/100
Essentially, “Moves Like Jagger”’s older brother.
- “Can’t Hold Us” by Macklemore & Ryan Lewis: 100/100
I might be slightly biased towards this one.
- “Stereo Hearts” by Gym Class Heroes: 39/100
“Gym Class Heroes” would be a great name for an Imagine Dragons album.
- “Pumped Up Kicks” by Foster The People: 95/100
The distress after learning what this song is about has to be a canon event.
- “Billionaire” by Travie McCoy & Bruno Mars: 48/100
I think about this song whenever I want something cool but can’t afford it.
- “Party Rock Anthem” by LMFAO: 35/100
Might be controversial, but this song does not hold up.
- “Good Life” by OneRepublic: 99/100
This song just feels really good. (also “I Lived” feels like a sequel to this song in a way.)
- “Ophelia” by The Lumineers: 99/100:
Top 3 Lumineers songs, probably,
- “Stolen Dance” by Milky Chance: 99/100
The streak of amazing songs continues. Whew.
- “Life Is a Highway” by Rascal Flatts: 85/100
Has me feeling like Lightning McQueen.
- “See You Again” by Wiz Khalifa & Charlie Puth: 85/100
5th-grade graduation core.
- “7 Years” by Lukas Graham: 40/100
- “Demons” by Imagine Dragons: 97/100
Probably the best Imagine Dragons song, dodged the P.E. teacher playlist, and therefore managed to be good.
- “Some Nights” by fun.: 98/100
Can fun. please start making music again.
- “Midnight City” by M83: 95/100
Really good song from a really good album, if you like this song i’d highly recommend more of M83’s work.
- “Rocketeer” by Far East Movement: 42/100
Not bad, not great, I would say it’s somewhere in the middle, but it’s a little less than that.
- “Keep Your Head Up” by Andy Grammer 55/100
“This for everybody going through tough times; believe me, been there, done that,” vibes
- “Little Talks” by Of Monsters and Men: 97/100
I have little to talk about with this one; it’s just great.
- “Thrift Shop” by Macklemore and Ryan Lewis: 32/100
Has some funny bars, entertaining writing, but it’s a skip on the album, and something I’d tune out whenever it comes on at Goodwill, and not something I’d willingly put on.
- “Centuries” by Fall Out Boy 85/100
Had nine-year-old me HYPED.
- “Castle on the Hill” by Ed Sheeran: 98/100
If you disagree, I don’t wanna hear it.
- “Hey There Delilah” by Plain White Tees: 89/100
Idk how to explain it, but this feels like a love song foreshadowing a breakup.
- “Not Afraid” by Eminem: 97/100
Good work, Marshall.
- “Dynamite” by Taio Cruz 70/100
- “Gansta’s Paradise” by Coolio & L.V.: 90/100
They vocoded this song to everything for a reason.
- “Dancin’ – Krono Remix” by Aaron Smith & Krono: 91/100
ᕕ(⌐■_■)ᕗ ♪♬
- “Timber” by Pitbull & Kesha: 95/100
Dale.
- “Teenage Dirtbag” by Wheatus: 100/100
- “Bad Day” by Daniel Powter: 63/100
“Keep Your Head Up,” but better.
- “Ho Hey” by The Lumineers: 81/100
Spotify says this is The Lumineers’ #1 song, and it’s great, but not their best at all.
- “Let Her Go” by Passenger: 89/100
- “Stay With Me” by Sam Smith: 67/100
The original Lewis Capaldi.
- “Home” by Phillip Phillips: 92/100
Just a feel-good song, hard not to rate it high.
- “Gone, Gone, Gone” by Phillip Phillips: 90/100
I’m surprised Phillip² isn’t more well known with how good these two songs are.
- “Die Young” by Kesha: 97/100
Holds up incredibly and still goes hard.
- “We Found Love” by Rihanna & Calvin Harris: 85/100
Considering the two people who made this song, of course it’s gonna be good.
- “Starships” by Nicki Minaj: 58/100
Doesn’t hold up very well, but does hit maybe once every other year.
- “Ride” by Twenty One Pilots: 97/100
Don’t lie to yourself.
- “The Nights” by Avicii: 90/100
or
- “I Took A Pill In Ibiza – Seeb Remix” by Mike Posner & Seeb: 98/100
If only remixers were still this locked in.
- “Someone To You” by BANNERS: 93/100
I’m running out of things to say.
- “On Top Of The World” by Imagine Dragons: 82/100
I’m starting to realize that Imagine Dragons are actually pretty good.
- “Stressed Out” by Twenty One Pilots: 72/100
I will not post the half baby-half toddler image.
- “Am I Wrong” by Nico & Vinz: 98/100
Am I wrong?
- “Umbrella” by Rihanna & JAY-Z: 98/100
I wish she didn’t stop making music.
- “Something Just Like This” by The Chainsmokers & Coldplay: 94/100
I’ve been reading books of old.
- “Shut Up and Dance” by WALK THE MOON: 70/100
Whatever floats your boat Nicholas.
- “Blank Space” by Taylor Swift: 89/100
Gotta love those Starbucks lovers.
- “Shake It Off” by Taylor Swift: 40/100
She’ll shake it off.
- “Summer” by Calvin Harris: 65/100
Wenamechainasuma.
- “Let Me Love You” DJ Snake & Justin Bieber: 90/100
Who is DJ Snake..?
- “Cold Water” by Major Lazer & Justin Bieber: 90/100
Would’ve been a 100/100 if I was about 10 years younger.
- “Halo” by Beyoncé: 97/100
See above.
- “Feel So Close” by Calvin Harris: 79/100
If only Calvin’s enunciation was as good as his production.
- “This Is What You Came For” by Calvin Harris & Rihanna: 88/10
This is.
- “Best Night” by Justice Crew” 88/100
Sounds like a Little Caesars pizza and a mug root beer.
- “No Money” by Galantis: 47/100
Roblox golden age type song
- “Cooler Than Me” by Mike Posner: 76/100
Paved the way for “I Took a Pill in Ibiza.”
- “Habits (Stay High) by Tove Lo: 60/100
bendercore
- “Tongue Tied” by GROUPLOVE: 100/100
- “Classic” by MKTO: 87/100
Scholastic book fair romance pt.2
- “Hall Of Fame” by The Script & will.i.am: 87/100
Makes me want to run a mile.
- “Last Friday Night” by Katy Perry: 83/100
- “Party In The U.S.A.” by Miley Cirus: 95/100
- “Animals” by Maroon 5: 96/100
His flow on this song is actually really nice to listen to.
- “Call Me Maybe” by Carly Rae Jepsen: 97/100
I wish phone number culture was still a thing.
- “Fancy” by Iggy Azalea & Charli xcx: 89/100
Iggy’s parts are decent, Charli’s parts are great.
- “Cake By The Ocean” by DNCE: 93/100
Wait, is this song freaky..?
- “On & On” by Cartoon: 85/100
- “TiK ToK” by Kesha: 82/100
Maybe wake up and feel like someone else Kesha.
- “Rude” by MAGIC! 55/100
It’s alright.
- “Whistle” by Flo Rida: 15/100
No thanks… 😟
- “Hot N Cold” by Katy Perry: 87/100
- “Mama Said” by Lukas Graham 35/100
- “Boom Clap” by Charli xcx: 100/100
It’s actually a 98/100, I just wanted 100/100 on #100
- “Waiting For Love” by Avicii: 94/100
Just another fun to listen to Avicii song.
- “I Love It” by Icona Pop & Charli xcx: 96/100
I think anything with Charli xcx is gonna be great.
- “Shape of You” by Ed Sheeran: 35/100
I don’t like down-bad Ed
- “There’s Nothing Holdin’ Me Back” by Shawn Mendes: 89/100
What happened to Shawn Mendes? Where is he now?
- “Don’t Let Me Down” by The Chainsmokers: 98/100
I hope I don’t let you down by excluding any songs.
- “Stitches” by Shawn Mendes 93/100
Every girl on the playground’s rejection anthem I swear.
- “Closer” by The Chainsmokers & Halsey: 99/100
The grip this song had on 2017 Youtube was insane.
- “Heathens” by Twenty One Pilots: 92/100
First time we thought we were tough. (hands up hands up, sway, sway, sway.)
- “Dark Horse” by Katy Perry: 95/100
Meep city party anthem (along with juju on that beat)
- “Havana” by Camila Cabello & Young Thug: 96/100
- “Roses” by The Chainsmokers & ROZES: 95/100
- “Only Girl (In The World)” by Rihanna 92/100
- “Don’t Stop The Music” by Rihanna 90/100
- “Love The Way You Lie” by Eminem & Rihanna: 94/100
- “Bad Blood” by Taylor Swift: 65/100
Not her best work.
- “My House” by Flo Rida: 79/100
I think my 5th grade teacher had a crush on him.