I’m five years old in the car with my aunt, Red blasting through the speakers. No matter what Taylor Swift sings about, my little heart feels every bit of emotion she puts into her music. Despite my past and current lack of romantic experience, Swift has a way of sharing her unique personal journey of life and love with her fans that almost makes it feel like we have gone through the same thing. Whether it’s belting to the tragic bridge of “Come Back…Be Here” or gushing through the chorus of “gold rush,” Swift’s storytelling capabilities put listeners in a fantasy of their own and allow each person the unique ability to dream while consuming her work.
However, creating a communal experience out of something so personal comes with its downsides. As I grew older, Taylor Swift occupied only a corner of my mind as I explored other genres of music. It was when she began rereleasing her music that she truly embarked on the path that has catapulted her to the level of stardom she possesses today. My sister, who (sorry for outing you like this) used to complain about me playing the 10-minute version of “All Too Well,” now all of a sudden exclusively listened to the singer. On my feed, Instagram post after Instagram post appeared, speculating about the easter egg that must be hidden in her newest caption. As she accumulated more fans, she also gathered a growing number of haters. The complaint that I see the most about Taylor Swift fans is how obsessed with her they are, and I have to wonder, is it because of how intimate her songs can be?
As she has become more popular, fans are more interested in her personal life, which as I’ve stated before, she has written many songs about and has come under public scrutiny many times before. Her private feelings that she has shared with the world have created a parasocial relationship with her for some fans, generating feelings of entitlement towards knowing everything about her or controlling her life. Moreover, her ambitiousness towards releasing new albums spoils us as fans. In the span of two years, she released 4 albums (Red (Taylor’s Version), Speak Now (Taylor’s Version), 1989 (Taylor’s Version), and Midnights), and yet fans were desperate for another. The singer more outrightly conveys these feelings of exhaustion in her newest album, The Tortured Poets Department. In “I Can Do It With A Broken Heart,” Swift details how “[she] can show you lies” in her “glittering prime.” As many people know, she went through the breakup of her long-term relationship during the Eras Tour. This no doubt left her physically and emotionally worn out, however “as the crowd…[chanted], ‘More’”, she had no choice but to plaster a smile on her face and continue performing.
If “I Can Do It With A Broken Heart” is a more direct message to her fans about the pressure she feels, “But Daddy I Love Him” is a more faceted view of how she feels about her relationship with some fans. In May of 2023, it was speculated that Taylor Swift was dating Matty Healy, the lead vocalist of the 1975, but more importantly to this narrative, a person with past behavior that was most unfavorable among Twitter users. With Swifties being a majority female fanbase, Healy’s racist and misogynistic jokes stirred up protests against Taylor’s relationship with him, and it came out in June that they had broken up. After the release of her latest album, fans have speculated that “But Daddy I Love Him” is about her relationship with Matty Healy. The following are some interpretations of the song’s lyrics:
- “Sarahs and Hannahs in their Sunday best/Clutching their pearls, sighing ‘What a mess’”
- Sarah and Hannah would be everyday people in your community who know nothing about you. In these lines, she describes her fans’ (the Sarah and Hannahs) reactions to the news of her dating Healy.
- “I’m having his baby/No, I’m not, but you should see your faces” & “No, I’m not coming to my senses/I know he’s crazy but he’s the one I want”
- I think this is about how she feels about the rumors surrounding her dating life, which has been her most defining feature to talk show hosts and gossip columns. Rumors are often untrue, however, she describes her newfound apathy toward being the perfect idol for her fans. In addition, she asserts that she knows about his problematic past and what people say about it, but it doesn’t change how she feels about him.
- Post-Chorus
- Probably the boldest “I don’t care” in her album, I kinda dig this part (I don’t dig Matty Healy though).
- “Sanctimoniously performing soliloquies I’ll never see”
- This could be for her fans and her haters. When directed at her fans, she’s saying that they think they know her so well, but when they go online and rant about her dating life, it doesn’t matter to her because they are preaching to the choir. When singing to her haters, she’s telling them they think too highly of themselves for not liking her.
- “I’m his lady, and oh my God/You should see your faces”
- Her disdain at her fans for criticizing her and the person that brings her happiness.
Just in these two songs, Swift communicates her purely sweet relationship with her fans has ended. When I first listened to The Tortured Poets Department, the first thing I noticed was that the feeling behind each of the songs felt different even if they were love songs like many of her previous songs. Compared to her past albums, which felt more cohesive, listening to TTPD felt like standing in a sandstorm, but everything around you was mute. I think she finally realized there is no way to please everyone after all the events that have conspired in the past two years and good for her, I hope she can find some peace. She is held to many standards, especially because of her diverse demographics. I don’t know if we’ll get such a straightforward and raw album from her like this again.