I like what I like, it’s not a lot, but it’s good. Always being a picky eater, it’s hard to venture out and try the hottest new restaurant, and it’s embarrassing to order in front of friends who have yet to discover my deepest “flaw” (as most people call it). But I believe that I just appreciate the little things. I get excited when I discover a new brand of bread; learning about how different recipes and yeast mixtures make for different types of bread. Simply taking in each bite of plain, salted pasta is one of my all-time favorites. Where other people lather their grainy bowl of delight in disgusting tomato sauce or some concoction of seafood or dressings, these over-the-top additions take away from the pasta. If you want to eat a bowl of tomato sauce and are too scared to admit it, I know your secret, don’t worry. It’s not safe with me.
Here are some foods I don’t like that I think you might get a kick out of… but hear me out.
Olives: What is wrong with you? I get enjoying other vegetables (no I don’t), but olives, really? The smell is one of the worst things to exist. I rather stumble upon a 1,000-year-old sewer system than sit in a room with my sister as she devours Trader Joe’s olives straight from the glass jar. “Don’t knock it till you’ve tried it.” I have. I wish I could unlive this treacherous experience.
Pineapple pizza: The most adventurous you will catch me with pizza is putting just under the normal amount of sauce on my homemade pieces from the safety of my own kitchen. I hate tomatoes… but the “extra sausage, light cheese combo” is to die for. Pineapple on pizza is a no. It’s the textures that do it for me. I also am not a big fan of pineapple anyways.
Carrot cake, lemon cake/ lemon loaf (with zest in it), and meatloaf: All of these things are a no. The textures are too bizarre, that’s a big part of my pickiness. Carrot cake should not exist. I love carrots, I rather eat them whole. Lemon zest just sets the cake apart. Picture this, you bite into a soft, moist lemon loaf/ cake and bam. You bite down on zest pieces… why is my moist cake crunching between my teeth… (The same goes for cornbread… absolutely NO whole corn shall be found in my muffins or loaves). Lastly, meatloaf. Hello, carrot. Why do you sit mushed within my meat? From the horror stories on television shows to my in-person experiences with this mess of a recipe, the random slue of ingredients inside of meatloaf do NOT belong within my stomach.
Lasagna: Look y’all. As an Italian, I’m sincerely sorry, but it’s the same thing as pasta. I rather enjoy the thick noodles and meat maybe with some parmesan cheese, maybe a good pesto or alfredo, but I hate tomatoes. So it’s simply a no for me. Sorry.
I could go on and on, I really could, but I will spare you the pain of reading through your probable list of favorite foods. Growing up a picky eater is not hard, it just sometimes comes across as hurtful to “chefs.” I try to shovel down a chili or spaghetti squash but I just can’t do it. I veer towards the appetizer options at take-out stores and will be caught checking my burger or chicken sandwich at the drive-thru window to make sure no tomatoes or pickles where there should not be. It’s just who I am.