By Cassie Kim
#notallmen has been a trending hashtag that is used as a one-size fits all argument that many men use to deflect the discomfort that they may feel around misogyny. These men argue that they don’t harass women or that they don’t rape others, actions that many people consider to be common decency. This faulty argument and deflection diminishes the experiences that women have had; it shifts the lens of the conversation away from women and their experiences. Obviously, not all men are sexist or rapists, but no one was arguing that to begin with. The issue is not against men, but against the patriarchy that our society perpetuates. The issue is with the system that looks at women as inferior, the system that teaches toxic masculinity to young boys and men. There is something wrong with our society if women feel the need to hold their keys in between their fingers when walking home in the dark. There is something wrong with our society, not because all men are bad people, but because the way our society nurtures young boys teaches them to view women as less. Claiming that you are a “good guy” because you don’t participate in rape or harassment is the absolute bare minimum and reveals a massive lack of insight and self-reflection. In order to truly make a difference, we need to stop using #notallmen because it truly solves nothing and shifts the focus away from the true issue at hand. We need to refocus the conversation in order to actively work against misogyny and toxic masculinity which are so deeply ingrained in our culture and society.